1998 Dad Visit - part 2 (final)

We parked the car, walked down to the train stop near North Park College and rode it into the city, this time successfully switching lines heading toward ‘The Loop’ and exiting nearby Michigan Avenue. The goal was to squeeze in as many of my favorite parts of Chicago into one day as I could but mostly I just wanted to enjoy a day with my dad; hopefully ending with him having a much better impression of the city and experiencing a glimpse of what I love about it. I knew the day would go by quickly and compromises would have to be made. We would have time for visiting some of my favorite places and buildings but not a lot of time for extended shopping, sightseeing, or sit down meals.

I admit that some of the details of the day are a little fuzzy now as they have started to blend together with the many trips I have since taken to Chicago. As with any trip I have ever taken there, we spent the majority of the day on our feet. We were prepared, wearing our comfortable walking shoes, and of course up for some extra walking - something that we both love to do. We walked up and down Michigan Avenue where I pointed out many of my favorite buildings and significant things about them that I could remember from my previous trip. To save money and time, we ate lunch at McDonald's. We spent some time talking about The Old Watertower and how amazing it is to see it still standing today after having survived The Great Chicago Fire of 1871. Nearby, we went inside Watertower Place. I knew that he would like the unique mall; watching the jumping waterfall near the escalators and riding the glass elevator to the top floor and peering over the edge down to the lower levels. We walked to The Wrigley Building and over The Michigan Avenue Bridge where we spent time looking at The Chicago River and watching boats full of people on the architectural tour pass by. We stopped at The Hancock Building and the Cheesecake Factory to get some cheesecake for the road as the wait was several hours long if I remember correctly. (When is it not?) Lastly we headed out to Navy Pier to do some exploring and ride the Ferris wheel. My dad has always been a fan of amusement parks (as have I) and I knew that would be a good way to end our day. The view of the city from the Ferris wheel was so magical. I may have been twenty-one years old but it felt more like six in that moment.

We had experienced a lot of Chicago in just one day. All too quickly it passed though and soon it was time to head back to the train, back to the car, and back to Iowa City. We weren't on the road very long when it started to snow. Dad drove the whole way back to Iowa City slowly but steadily creeping along on the hazardous roads as the snow continued to pour down...not that I really noticed though...I slept the entire way back!

Looking back now, it really is amazing how much difference one day can make. My dad could have said 'no' to my idea to go to Chicago for the day. It was a pretty crazy idea after all, and there was no time for planning. But it made all the difference to me that he didn't. He took a chance and let me lead the way. I hope that I can remember that in the future when Hannah comes up with a crazy scheme of her own. It was a visit that I will never forget. But of course...it led to more trips back to Chicago...

1998 Dad Visit - Part 1

I think my dad had mixed emotions about me attending The University of Iowa. I remember the first thing he said to me when I told him that I wanted to transfer was something along the lines of "As long as you don't get any body piercings." Hmmm...better keep those plans to get a belly ring quiet. I knew that he didn't like it that I would be five and a half hours away from him instead of the quick one hour drive straight up I-29. I thought he probably also questioned why I wanted to change my major since he was a teacher and loved it his entire life. But nothing stood in the way of him supporting my decision. It wasn't until I received my packet of materials and breakdown of tuition costs that I really knew I was doing the right thing. The words "Transfer Scholarship" stood out to me. What? I didn't apply for a scholarship? After further examination of the packet I realized that someone in admissions just decided to give me a scholarship upon reading my application. As long as I kept my GPA above 3.5, tuition would be free until I graduated. That was more assurance than I needed; I knew that God was steering me towards Iowa City.

In the fall of 1998 dad came to visit me for a weekend at my new school. It was the first weekend visit that I recall without mom being along with him; the divorce had been finalized in the spring of that year. But that did not bother me. I missed my dad and I was really looking forward to some quality time together, just the two of us.

He hadn't been at my apartment long when we decided to go shopping and out for dinner. Aren't dad visits great for that? He insisted on spoiling me, paying for those splurges that I really wanted but couldn't afford to buy myself; clothing, brand name cereal, my favorite bottled juice, and eating out were just some of them. We went to the Coralville Mall where he bought me this adorable navy blue and orange striped stocking hat and matching orange fleece scarf at The Gap that would both accessorize my new navy blue winter coat and keep me warm on those long walks to and from class. After shopping we went out to eat at Bennigan's Restaurant in the mall.

We were sitting waiting for our meal when a killer idea popped in my head. Should I say it out loud? I wondered as I fidgeted with my silverware on the forest green vinyl tablecloth illuminated by a small lamp with a green glass lampshade. No, he won't go for it. But then it came back with stronger force than the first time. Yes, I should. It was a great idea. "Let's drive into Chicago tomorrow." The words practically blurted themselves out! Just as I suspected, as soon as they did, he tipped his head a little to the side and gave me that grin that he always does right before he tells me that I have officially gone crazy. He tried to talk me out of it but I had a strong argument. We had no plans for the rest of the weekend and all we really needed was a little gas money. I explained to him that I still had the scribbled directions from my last road trip there and we would just follow the same route. I didn't point my finger and shake it at him or tell him to "zippa zippa" his mouth shut when he gave me any excuses, but I did insist as if I was the parent and he was the child. I knew that he needed to get away more than he was willing to admit and I wanted to show him as much as I could in one day of what I loved and experienced from my first trip to Chicago. He caved. We were going!

We woke up early the next morning to drive into Chicago. It was a chilly fall day, perfect weather to test out my new hat and scarf. And I do remember that it looked adorable with my short hair flipping out from under it. On the way, my dad mentioned that he had driven through Chicago on the interstate before, but he never stopped. You were right there and you didn't stop? I wondered. His understanding of Chicago up to this point was mainly that it was a big, dirty city but none the less he traveled along with an open mind. I decided that it would be best to just do exactly as I had done on my first trip; drive through downtown to North Park College where we could park our car safely and take the train downtown for the day. It seemed a little ridiculous and out of the way, but we agreed it was the best choice for us since I really wasn't too familiar with how parking worked downtown and I knew that this way dad wouldn't be worrying all day about something happening to his car if we parked near the small college campus that our church supported.

As we got closer to the city, dad told me to look at the map and let him know when he had to turn on Lakeshore Drive. "Well if you start driving into Lake Michigan, you've gone too far" was my response. We continued to joke about that the rest of the way there. Our excitement started to build as we slowly drove closer and closer to the skyline. Soon the buildings began to hug us and we drove into the heart of the city. As we drove along Lakeshore Drive the view of the city was breathtaking. I don't know where I inherited it because I don't think anyone else in my family really cares much for large cities, but I must be a city girl at heart because for me this view is like driving up a mountain for a long distance and then turning around to see nature in all of it's glorious splendor behind you. It was cold that day, but the sun shone brightly, highlighting all of the buildings before us and sparkling on the aquamarine blue water of Lake Michigan. Dad commented on how clean and beautiful the city looked; I don't think it was quite what he was expecting.

1997 Chicago Roadtrip - part 3 (final)

We spent the remainder of our time in Chicago doing everything else on our agenda and taking in as much as we could. We went up to the top of the John Hancock Building and stared out at the city; Lake Michigan in all of it's marine blue ocean-like glory and taxi cabs that from the ninety fourth floor looked like matchbox cars. We took our pictures standing in front of goofy boards that make it look like you are lying on a construction beam hanging out over the edge of the building. We drove along beautiful Lakeshore Drive out to Shedd Aquarium where we looked at thousands of types of fish, so many that after awhile we got a little numb to how amazing each variety was. We paid extra to see the dolphin show and get to see the otters. I had no idea what silly little creatures otters are. They were my favorite! Last, we went to Navy Pier, rode the 150 foot high Ferris wheel, walked around the pier, and watched the jumping water fountains with childlike wonder.

As we got in the car to drive back to Sioux Falls we couldn't believe that we managed to check off all items on our itinerary. We experienced a little bit of everything and had so much fun. But I knew there was so much more, we had just barely scraped the surface. So much more was calling me back, whispering me home. It was something I was missing; in reality my parents were in the midst of a divorce and I would soon lose the home of my first twenty years of life. But nothing could be done now. It was time to face that and drive back to our everyday lives and the reality of growing pains, class, textbooks, assignments, and work. I settled for goodbye.

As I look back now, I can see how much this single event - just one extended weekend roadtrip - changed my life. I came back to Augustana College and it was very apparent to me that I was unhappy there. I was going through so much with school, work, and home life and really trying to make things work, but the truth was that as much as I tried or wanted to make the pieces fit together...they just didn't. I knew I had to make some changes. I was studying both Elementary and Early Childhood Education and after having spent forty some hours in a fourth grade classroom, suddenly I wondered how was it going to work for me to teach (annoying) kids all day long and then someday come home to my own kids, also requiring attention, patience, and teaching of their own? I thought about what was going on with my parents. I thought about what college was costing me and my parents. And then I thought: What was it that I really wanted? I had been making my own decisions, but basing them too much on influence from family members, teachers, and the "What You Do Next" handbook.

The first decision was easy. I would leave Augustana. If you are going to spend that much on a private college education you better love it, and the truth was I didn't. Not the campus, my professors, my field of study, or classmates that to me were all made from a very similar cookie cutter. The hardest thing to leave was my roommate, but like any good friend she understood. From there, I made the difficult decision to move home to Sioux City, Iowa for one semester so that I could face life with separated and soon to be divorced parents. While I was there I would take some general coursework at WIT Community College and work to make some extra cash that I would need when I left in the fall to attend...you guessed it...The University of Iowa. That was what I wanted; to live at "The Java House," roadtrip to Chicago, and study Art in my spare time.

1997 Chicago Roadtrip - part 2

We woke up early the next morning and hit the road to Chicago. It was about a four hour drive from Iowa City. My two best friends at Iowa decided that they would like to come along and partake in some shopping for the day with us so we took two cars. We headed for the suburbs and enjoyed the day shopping together. I can't remember what mall we were at now but it was really big with many floors and a lot of great stores.

After shopping and eating lunch I decided it was time. I had been thinking about it for a couple months and decided that I did indeed want to cut twelve inches off my hair. I was feeling adventurous and wanted a new look. I was going for the "Friends" (Rachel) hairstyle, and I got it. I was used to having long and curly (Yes, spiral-permed. Ahem.) hair without any layers so it was a very big change for me. As she trimmed large chunks of hair, weight was literally lifted off my shoulders. I loved it. How is it that something so cute and popular at the time a mere eleven years ago can look absolutely hideous now? Because wow. It does. I only wish that the stylist had taught me a quick way to style it because after many, many months of taking the time to blow it dry while curling each individual section of hair by using a hot air brush and holding the blow dryer over it for a few minutes, I realized that I could do the same thing just by drying it all at once and then instead just using a curling iron upside down to make it 'flip.' Oh the trauma my roommate inevitably went through with all those mornings fixing my hair for class, turning the dryer on and off in between each perfectly rolled section on the brush most definitely wishing I would just shut the dryer off already so she could continue sleeping. Be honest, are you annoyed just reading this? I am! She was too nice to tell me to shut up!

After we had our fill at the mall, we said our goodbyes to my friends from Iowa and ventured in another direction - North Park College, located just north of downtown Chicago. I had a friend that I worked with at summer camp that was attending NPC and graciously offered us a place to crash for a couple nights. That's what college roadtrips are all about after all - find a friend that you can stay with and drive there. In college, you don't need a hotel. And quite frankly, you can't afford it. I have found you really don't even need bedding if you sleep in your clothes using your backpack as a pillow. You don't sleep very well that way and tend to be pretty pissed off when you wake up but when you are young you get over it quickly. I was so ecstatic to not only see my friend in Chicago but also because she was willing to let us stay with her because I had never been there and was dying to check out what big city life was all about.

Our first taste of it was driving into a mass amount of traffic using our map and scribbled directions to find our way to the college. Keep in mind this is before cell phones (Yes kids, I am that old. I didn’t get my first cell phone until the Fall of 1999 - two years later). We planned to park at the campus and then my Chicago friend had explained that we could easily take the subway anywhere we wanted to go from there. Surprisingly, we navigated well and arrived in one piece at NPC early that evening. To this day, I can’t help but think of driving in Chicago whenever I hear the Barenaked Ladies “Hello City.” I’m sure it must have been playing at the time. We determined that we would all walk to the closest “L” stop and ride together into the city so that we could get a feel for how things work and how to ride “The Loop.” After arriving downtown, we went out for some Chicago-style pizza at Giordano’s, walked around Michigan Avenue while my Chicago friend pointed out some specific buildings and told us some of their history: The Old Water Tower and Water Tower Park, Wrigley Building, John Hancock Building, Tribune Tower, and Michigan Avenue Bridge among them. I was like a kid in a candy store looking around at all of the architecture that surrounded us and all of the lights of the big city.

Since I come from a family that likes to plan out tourist-style vacations, for the next couple of days we had an itinerary. We researched everything we wanted to do accounting for location, proximity, and cost; both of us contributing items that we would like to experience while there. We planned to shop Michigan Avenue, go to the top of the Hancock Building, visit Shedd Aquarium for the dolphin show, and go to Navy Pier.

What we didn't plan for was rain and wind; and a lot of it. In the moment as we walked down Michigan Avenue both of us clutching for dear life onto the sides of a small cheap cherry red umbrella that had by this time in the day turned inside out with the metal prongs just totally and completely bent to hell while we got pelted in the face with rain and the tornado like winds blew my perfectly curled hair to a style resembling more of Albert Einstein than Rachel Green; yes, that was exactly when I realized why Chicago was named "The Windy City." We decided that we were drawing more attention to our uncool touristy selves so we ditched the umbrella in a nearby trash can and ducked off the main road for a little cheesecake and shelter at the ever popular Cheesecake Factory. My adolescent taste buds never really cared for cheesecake, but apparently they had matured because after one bite of this stuff I felt like I was floating on a cloud in cheesecake heaven. We sat at the coffee bar and enjoyed our cheesecake and a cup of coffee together, laughing about our day. I don't recall the name of it now but it was the best cheesecake I have ever had.
At the end of our day we hit the low point of our trip. We were cold, wet, and exhausted. It had been a long day. So we decided it was time to head back to NPC, change into dry clothing and get some rest. We headed for the nearest L stop and proceeded to ride the loop. Somehow in all of our exhaustion we missed the stop where we could switch lines heading north on the train toward campus. We didn’t really know what to do. We quietly panicked to ourselves trying not to draw attention. My friend wanted to get off and then take the next train headed one stop back to where we actually should have gotten off to begin with (and I now realize that would have been smarter) but at the time I wasn’t sure that was a good idea because I didn’t really know the area and just somehow felt safer on the train instead of standing on a platform unsure when the next train heading in the right direction would arrive. So, we rode it out. And let me say this with emphasis, the entire loop. We rode it back all the way around to where we started, and amazingly got off at the right stop. Had we missed it again, I'm not sure either of us would have survived the cat fight. We were so crabby. No - we were mad! It was a quiet train ride. Not a peep from either of us. But do not fear, by the time we got off the train and started walking back to NPC we were already over it and laughing our heads off about what had just happened. That was the moment that I knew our friendship was real. We had a fight. Real friends can fight, get over it, and laugh about it.

1997 Chicago Roadtrip - part 1

What started out as an innocent road trip to Chicago with my college roommate changed my life. We were on fall break from our sophomore year at Augustana College in Sioux Falls, SD and decided that we should get out of Dodge. We needed to get out of Dodge. Come to think of it...were we actually on fall break, or did we just skip class for an extended four day weekend? Tomato, tom(ah)to. I remember how wonderful and surreal it was to have the freedom to do so, having purchased my first car just months before the summer of that same year.

We made our plans and packed our bags, of course making sure to pack our compact disks, a road trip essential. I remember my roommate had just purchased a couple of new CD's for the trip "The Mighty Mighty Bostones - Let's Face It" and "Barenaked Ladies - Rock Spectacle." Can you leave Best Buy or Target with just a single CD? Nope, you have to buy two. At least we had to. I wasn't familiar with either and remember thinking Who are the Barenaked Ladies? What a strange, perverse name for a band. But my doubts didn't last long when she told me that she had seen them live with Dave Matthews Band (at an outdoor concert in Colorado no less) and they were very fun and hilarious. A band that is a friend of Dave Matthews is a friend of mine. It was never clear to me at the time, but looking back this roommate in particular was so instrumental in breaking me out of the 'good girl mold.' Just a little though - we were good girls and still are now but I am so grateful now for the way that she at times very subtly nudged me to break the rules. Listen and love the "Barenaked Ladies," drink a beer, wear that spaghetti strap tank top...and so on. We crammed everything into my grey four door Ford Tempo and we were on our way.

We stopped just over mid way on our journey to stay overnight in Iowa City, IA with a best friend of mine that had recently transferred to the University of Iowa. I wasn't familiar with Iowa City or the University of Iowa since it was never on my list of schools I considered to attend. I knew a handful people from the popular crowd in my high school class would be attending and I was certain that they would somehow get in my way of a fresh start and furthermore crush the discovery of self promised to me by every college brochure I received in the mail. I would soon discover just how big the school was and for me to think that ten or so members of my graduating class would stand in my way was just plain ridiculous.

That night my roommate had plans to meet up with one of her friends from Sioux Falls at "The Union," one of the most popular college bars (Did I mention that here you don't have to be 21 to get in?) and I had plans to meet for coffee with my friend that we were staying with and another best friend from high school. We needed to catch up, just the three of us, so we went to "The Java House," the most wonderful coffee shop in the world. I had my first "Sugar Daddy Latte" and couldn't get over how much I loved everything about the inviting and relaxing atmosphere of the shop; the smell of the coffee, sounds of shoes on the creaky refinished old wood floor and jingle of the bell on the door as people walked in or out. I couldn't help but look around in amazement at the dimly lit space with an old but functioning wooden phone booth and calming grey colored walls that were lined with artwork highlighted by track lighting. It was real artwork, not 'hotel art' or framed posters. There were all types of seating arrangements to accommodate all needs for drinking a cup of coffee; comfortable sofas arranged with low coffee tables, bar stools, and large tables with lamplight for studying. I wanted to move in.

It was a nice night and we continued to catch up on each other's lives as we walked back to my friend's room located in the Courrier dorm through the pedestrian mall, known to all college students and residents as the 'Ped Mall.' Everywhere we went I looked around in amazement. People were out walking around and enjoying themselves. All kinds of people. I felt a connection to a city and a school that up to this point in my life I hadn't felt before. It was an equal mix of old and new that made it very unique. It felt like I was experiencing the culture, artwork, and other qualities of a big city, although in reality I was in a small town in Iowa no less. I wished that I had more time to explore and people watch. I loved the reminder to the history and heritage of Iowa City that I felt while walking along cobblestone roads looking at the old buildings that were restored and sustained. This was over eleven years ago, but I remember it like it was yesterday.